Twitter? Or shall I just fuck off?

Have you ever really hated the premise of something but found yourself unable to not enjoy it, in some twisted variance of cosmic malarkey? Of course you have. It's the only way to explain why Gossip Girl is still on the air.

It also explains the appeal of Twitter.

I'm on it every day now and have you any idea how much that annoys me? Do you? Well, jiggle my testes, you're about to find out. Because I seriously struggle to fathom the point of this new phase of social networking, unless you're keen to find out what train Stephen Fry is about to get on in Lowestoft or what Barack Obama had for breakfast. WMD on the cob? Who gives a flying fuck?

BUT... I can hear you saying. BUT... it's a good way of getting updates on various events/things etc.., an interesting quick way of communicating thoughts and ideas over the medium of blah blah blah blah bollocky jugs! MSN has been doing this for years and the only advantage of Twitter is that you don't get annoying idiots constantly assaulting your desktop every two seconds wanting to 'chat' whenever you log on. Or webcams - which are a recipe for compromising disaster, but that's another story.

I'm a hypocrit though, surely? I hate what Twitter is but I love posting on it. Oh, absolutely. I'm a massive hypocrit. I hate people for doing things I do every day. Which probably invalidates this entire post. Is that the sound of me caring you hear? No.

Turns out it's actually a damn good vehicle for conversatzione with my chums in the VS world and for that, I like it. But I shall forever despise the concept of being limited to saying something in less than 150 words so by the time you're just getting interesting, you're cut--